Approximately 160,000 students don't attend school every day because they are in fear of being
bullied. (U.S. Department of Justice and the National Association of School Psychologists)
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Bullying is a concern across our nation and within our own schools in Huber Heights. Bullying has led to some
of the most terrifying events in our nations history. Bullying occurs across our nation and we cannot sit back
and hope it does not affect our schools. The SROs and the Warriors Crime Watch routinely visit the schools
to conduct presentations on bullying to educate everyone on the consequences. There is more that can be
done with the help of parents and students. Below are some helpful tips to follow if you find your child is being
bullied, witnesses bullying, or you fear they are becoming a bully themselves. In any instant you should
contact an adult at their school who can offer you help.
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So what is Bullying?
A lot of young people have a good idea of what bullying is because they see it every day! Bullying happens when someone
hurts or scares another person on purpose and the person being bullied has a hard time defending himself or herself.
Usually, bullying happens over and over.
-Punching, shoving and other acts that hurt people physically
-Spreading bad rumors about people
-Keeping certain people out of a "group"
-Teasing people in a mean way
-Getting certain people to "gang up" on others
-There are many ways that young people bully each other, even if they don't realize it at the time.
Unfortunately, not everyone takes bullying seriously, including adults. Which is one of the main reasons that the Youth Expert
Panel has worked alongside the representatives of the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services (HHS) and the
Maternal and Child Health Bureau (MCHB) to develop the Take A Stand. Lend A Hand. Stop Bullying Now! campaign.
www.stopbullyingnow.hrsa.gov
Why do kids Bully?
There are all kinds of reasons why young people bully others, either occasionally or often. Do any of these sound familiar to
you?
-Because I see others doing it
-Because it's what you do if you want to hang out with the right crowd
-Because it makes me feel, stronger, smarter, or better than the person I'm bullying
-Because it's one of the best ways to keep others from bullying me
Whatever the reason, bullying is something we all need to think about. Whether we've done it ourselves ... or whether friends
or other people we know are doing it ... we all need to recognize that bullying has a terrible effect on the lives of young
people. It may not be happening to you today, but it could tomorrow. Working together, we can make the lives of young
people better.
Effects of Bullying?
If you've ever heard an adult - or anyone else - say that bullying is "just a fact of life" or "no big deal," you're not alone! Too
often, people just don't take bullying seriously - or until the sad and sometimes scary stories are revealed. It happens a lot
more than some people think - Studies show that between 15-25% of U.S. students are bullied with some frequency, while
15-20% report they bully others with some frequency (Melton et al, 1988; Nansel et al, 2001).
It can mess up a kid's future. Young people who bully are more likely than those who don't bully to skip school and drop out
of school. They are also more likely to smoke, drink alcohol and get into fights (Nansel et al, 2003; Olweus, 1993).
It can lead to huge problems later in life. Children who bully are more likely to get into fights, vandalize property, and drop out
of school. And 60% of boys who were bullies in middle school had at least one criminal conviction by the age of 24 (Olweus,
1993).
What you can do about Bullying?
You're here, so at least you've been thinking about the fact that bullying is a pretty big problem. You're right, it is! But what
can you do about it? You can do a lot! Whether you are being bullied, you have seen kids being bullied, or you're pretty
sure you have bullied others, there are plenty of good things you can do to help make sure it doesn't happen again. No
matter how you've been affected by bullying, it's a good idea to talk to an adult. Even though it's hard to talk to adults
sometimes, they can help!
So are you Bullied?
That can feel pretty awful. But, no matter how bad it makes you feel sometimes, you should know you're not alone. That's
right ... there are plenty of kids all over the world who go through the same things you do every day. And, even though you
may feel helpless sometimes, there are a lot of things you and others can do to help stop the bullying. Give these tips a try.
Always tell an adult. It's hard to talk about serious things with adults sometimes, but they can help put a stop to bullying.
Tell an adult that you trust and can talk to—your parents, your teacher, your school counselor, your coach, your neighbor. If
you've told a grown-up before and they haven't done anything about it, tell someone else. And if you're afraid to tell an adult
that you have been bullied, get another person—like a friend or a sister or brother—to go with you. Having someone else
there to support you can make it a lot less scary. Tell the adults exactly what has happened—who did the bullying, where
and when it happened, how long it's been happening to you, and how it's making you feel. If you talk with an adult at your
school, ask them what they will do to help stop the bullying. It is their job to help keep you safe. Most adults really care about
bullying and will do everything they can to help you.
Stay in a group. Kids who bully like to pick on kids who are by themselves a lot— it's easier and they're more likely to get
away with their bad behavior. If you spend more time with other kids, you may not be an easy "target" and you'll have others
around to help you if you get into a difficult situation!
If it feels safe, try to stand up to the person who is bullying you. If the person who is bullying you thinks you
won't do anything about it, they are more likely to keep picking on you. This doesn't mean you should fight back or bully
them back. Instead, tell the person bullying you that you don't like it and that they should stop! Keep it simple. You might just
say, "Cut it out, Miranda!", and then walk away. If possible, try to talk to them in a calm voice. Kids who bully often like to see
that they can make you upset. If you're afraid to talk to the person who is bullying you by yourself, then you might want to
ask someone else to be there with you. Kids who bully are more likely to listen, and less likely to bully you, when you're with
someone and not alone. If you're not comfortable standing up to someone who has bullied you, that's definitely OK! Just
walk away. But be sure to tell an adult.
Join clubs or take part in activities where you'll meet other kids. Sometimes, it can help to join clubs or take part
in activities that interest you. Think about joining a sports team, taking an art class, or joining a scouting group, for example.
You can meet other kids who share your interestsÉand you might make some good friends!
What NOT to do if you are bullied.
DON'T...
-think it's your fault. Nobody deserves to be bullied!
-fight back or bully a person back. This probably won't make things any better and it might get you into big trouble. Besides,
you should try to act better than the person who bullies you.
-keep it to yourself and just hope the bullying will "go away." It's normal to want to try to ignore bullying and hope that it will
stop—or hope that the person will start to pick on someone else. But, often, bullying won't stop until adults and other kids get
involved. So, be sure to report the bullying.
-skip school or avoid clubs or sports because you're afraid of being bullied. Missing out on school or activities that you enjoy
isn't the answer. You have a right to be there!
-think that you're a "tattle tale" if you tell an adult that you've been bullied. Telling is NOT tattling! It's the right thing to do.
-hurt yourself. Some kids who are bullied get so sad and depressed that they may try to hurt themselves because they think
there is nothing else they can do. This definitely isn't the answer. Talk with an adult immediately and tell them how you are
feeling. They can help stop the bullying.
Do you witness Bullying? Are you a Bystander?
So, you aren't someone who bullies others, and you haven't been bullied yourself. But if you see it happening to others, you
can help put a stop to it. In order to stop bullying, everyone needs to lend a hand and get involved! And even though it might
be easier to stand by and watch (or try to ignore the bullying), just remember, we all need a little help from time to time!
Think about how you might feel if the bullying was happening to YOU. There are all kinds of great things you can do to help.
So the next time you see someone being bullied, try one (or more) of these ideas and make a real difference!
Report the bullying to an adult. Many kids who are bullied are scared to tell an adult about it (especially a teacher or
principal), because they are afraid the person bullying them will find out and the bullying will just get worse. That's where you
come in. Even if it's a little scary for you to tell an adult about bullying that you see, it's the right thing to do. It's not tattling—
you're helping someone out. Who should you tell? You could tell your teacher, school counselor, school nurse, parents,
coach, or any adult you feel comfortable talking with. It might be a little less scary if you ask a friend to go along with you. Be
sure to tell the adult exactly what happened—who was bullied, who did the bullying, and where and when it happened. If
you're not sure if another kid is being bullied but you think they probably are—it's good to report that, too. Most adults really
care about bullying and will be VERY glad that you told them about it. If you told an adult and you don't think they did
anything about the bullying (or if it isn't getting any better), find another adult to tell.
Support someone who is being bullied. Sometimes the best thing you can do for a person who is being bullied is just
to be there for him or her and be a friend. Whether this means agreeing to walk home with him or her after school, sitting
with him or her on the bus or at lunch, trying to include him or her in your school or social activities, or just spending some
time with him or her and trying to understand what he or she is going through, it will make a huge difference! Although these
may seem like small things to you, they will show a kid who is being bullied that you care about him or her and the problems
he or she is facing. And that can be a BIG help!
Stand up to the person doing the bullying. If you feel safe doing this, tell a person who is bullying that what he or
she is doing is wrong and that he or she should stop. Keep it simple. You could just say, "Ben, cut it out. Nobody thinks that's
funny." If you can, get some friends to join you. When kids who bully see that other kids don't think it's cool, they are more
likely to stop. Just be sure you don't bully them back! It's not easy to stand up to kids who may be bigger and stronger than
you or really popular, so if you're not comfortable doing this, that's OK. (But be sure to tell an adult!)
Do you Bully others?
If you bully others, we're glad you're here. If you're not sure if what you're doing is really bullying, then click here for a quick
quiz that'll help you decide. (But here's a hint: If you are hurting or threatening others in some way and using your size,
strength or popularity to do it ... you're probably bullying someone!)
Hey - let's face it, hurting and making others feel bad is NEVER cool. Just admitting that you are doing things to harm others
takes some guts. But that's not enough. Trying to find out what you should do to change the way you're acting ... now that's
a step in the right direction! So check out these tips ... they'll help you to start treating others with the respect they deserve.
Think about what you're doing ... and how it affects others. If you think calling others names is really harmless, or if you think
pushing, hitting or stealing from other kids is funny, you've forgotten what it feels like to be hurt yourself! Teasing, hitting,
keeping others out of a group - all of these things harm someone. All of us have been hurt at one time or another and we all
know how it feels - awful! So the next time you are about to bully someone:
-put yourself in their shoes
-think about how it must make them feel; and
and just don't do it.
-Talk to an adult. Making other people feel badly should never make you feel good. If it does, or if you're not really sure why
you bully other kids, you need to talk to an adult about it. Even though you might think an adult won't understand, or that
you'll get yourself into trouble, they can help! Whether it is your parent, a teacher or another trusted grown-up, you should
tell an adult how you've been acting so that they help you deal with it. School counselors are also great people to talk to
about how you feel and how to change the way you treat others.
What can adults do about Bullying?
As an adult, one of best ways you can help stop or prevent bullying is to be educated about, and sensitive to, the issue.
Bullying is NOT a rite of passage - an undesirable, but sometimes unavoidable, reality of growing up. Rather, bullying is a
serious public health issue that affects countless young people everyday. Further, research shows that the effects of
bullying can last well into adulthood. Whether you are a concerned parent, an educator or school employee, a health and
safety professional, or someone else who works with children, there are many things you can do to help.
First:
Stop and listen to the affected child. Take complaints of bullying seriously.
Second:
Be responsive. Take the appropriate steps to intervene.
Resources
There are several good websites with information and resources for bullying prevention. Visit them for more information and
resources to help prevent bullying in our schools or in the life of your child.
www.stopbullyingnow.hrsa.gov
www.safeyouth.org
www.ncdjjdp.org/cpsv/
www.no-bully.com
www.bullying.org
www.kidpower.org
www.cyberbully.org
